On Turning Forty
Four months from the writing of this very piece I’ll turn four decades old. At present I have four kids and am just over four years in to being a business owner. It would seem that four is my number this season.
Carl Jung, famed Swiss psychiatrist who founded analytical psychology, believed this about hitting the big 4-0- “Life really begins at 40; everything up to that point is just research.” Do you agree?
For sure, I have done my fair share of research. Research has led me to deep faith in Jesus Christ. Research has shaped my parenting styles, my nutritional choices and informed my career as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist. Research has molded my decisions not to do Botox or have work of any kind done to alter my facial features and/or body! If life begins at 40, I think I can finally commence putting my research into practice.
Forty is a milestone. Forty is a gift. I have a handful of close friends who have not made it this far. They were called home—due to accidents or illness-- before getting four full decades. And of course, I could be called home before the end of this year as well. But being that I’m still here now, I want to recognize the following truths as I approach this monumental birthday with gratitude:
1. Forty is infancy. We all remember being teenagers and thinking our forty-something parents were so old. Ancient, in fact. And definitely out-of-touch with reality. How embarrassing they were when they stumbled into one of our sporting events waving madly at us! Yet here we are. Forty caught us, too-- and in the grand scheme, it turns out 40 is young. We are existential babies! And if we are eternal souls created to live forever, 100 is young also. So long as we exist in earthly bodies on this side of eternity, we are indeed babes and toddlers. Chew on that.
2. Forty is a second birth. At least that’s how Carl Jung saw it. And many other great philosophers aligned. Nietzsche, for example, believed that personal growth happens when we transcend our own limitations and embrace change. At 40, this might mean letting go of outdated beliefs and/or redefining oneself. Thankfully, I let go of using Sun-In to turn my dark hair orange a couple of decades ago. But alas, there are still some proverbial sun-in bottles in my closet. This next year, this next decade (no matter our age), may we all clean out our closets, let go of outdated beliefs and practices that no longer fit, and embrace the beautiful, authentic souls we were made to be.
3. Forty is significant. The number four, and consequently the number 40, carry significant importance in biblical study. Four often signifies completeness and the number 40 often represents the end of a probation period or trial. We see examples of this in Jesus’ temptation in the wilderness for 40 days (Matthew 4), The Israelites desert-wandering for 40 years (Exodus 16) and the flood account in which it rained for 40 days and 40 nights (Genesis 7). Moses even fasted for 40 days on Mount Sinai and at the end received the 10 commandments (Exodus 24-34). If 40 is so significant throughout scripture and God never changes (Micah 3:6), what might 40 mean for me? What might it mean for you?
In ode to my fellow mid-life beauties—whether you’re 40, 50 or 60 plus: may we embrace the journey ahead with joy and curiosity, welcome the lines on our face that so gingerly outline our stories, tumble face-first like new toddlers, and brush ourselves off with a smile when we stand once more. After all, 40 is just the beginning.
